Welcome to this week’s Sex and the Woods: Lifestyle Advice for the Modern Adventurer. Remember, we’re here to give fresh perspective on age old questions and solutions to new quandaries which means we will take questions on sex and relationships in addition to everything from eco-etiquette to adventure tips. Just email advice@wendmag.com. We answer every Thursday!
This week we tackle the issues of traveling with your significant other.
Dear Anna and Dave
I know my question isn’t “woods” related, but I figured you guys would be the ones to ask anyway. My boyfriend and I are planning a 3 month trip to Southeast Asia. I’m really excited about going, but the problem is that we’ve never traveled together. Ever. Not even a road trip. Lots of my friends have traveled with their significant others and I know that sometimes it can put a strain on the relationship. Do you have any tips that will keep us from hating eachother at the end of our trip?
-Anxious for Asia
Dear Anxious for Asia,
Wait a second — you’ve never gone on a trip with your BF??? Not even a weekend camping excursion? Please, maybe before you book those tickets to Asia, you need to get out in the woods. Nothing will tell you more about a person than spending some alone time in an unknown place. We’d suggest figuring out a two-day trip, stat!
Back to the question at hand: yes, travel can be hard for two adventure seeking lovers, but it can also be a blessing. Your trip can go two ways: either you will come back nitpicking eachother’s every single annoying habit or you won’t be able to pull yourself away from eachother. Obviously you’d rather avoid the first, but remember that even if the trip goes well, you don’t want to come back a sappy, lovey dovey couple that can only talk about “this one time when we were in Asia…” You’re friends will never invite you on another weekend hike again. Stay far away from that route.
Hopefully the two of you are intelligent enough to be able to find a happy medium. First things first: travel can bring out the best and worst in a person, so know your partner’s positive and negative qualities before you leave. If you know that he is uncomfortable in situations where he isn’t in control, don’t go booking an elephant-riding jungle trek the minute you get off the plane. Let him adjust and then move forward accordingly.
Stay flexible and enjoy the moment. Nothing’s worse than a high maintenance travel partner that keeps their Western world expectations and attitudes when traveling abroad. Let go and live it up! Don’t overpack, don’t whine when you have to use a squat toilet and don’t be updating your Facebook status every time you come across an internet café. Otherwise you’ll find yourself dumped at the foot of a tuk tuk station in Phnom Penh faster than you can say “Sex and the Woods.”
Keep lines of communication open. Have the PTRT, otherwise known as the “Pre Travel Relationship Talk.” Outline your own wants and needs for your journey and have your significant other do the same. Think you might get homesick? Say so. That way when you want to break down and eat at an American restaurant in Bangkok, he won’t have any room to judge you (although we certainly will).
And finally: book a private room every now and then. Bunking up in shared hostel rooms with fellow dirty backpackers is a great way to make new friends and save some money. But you’ll want to be sure to get some international lovin’ in, and even though we believe in good ‘ole sex in the woods, you probably don’t want your first amorous experience abroad to be in a malaria ridden jungle. So just make sure to find yourself a nice private suite once in awhile.
Happy travels!
Anna + Dave
p.s. Anna says, “remember to pack an antibiotic ointment, you’ll never know when it will come in handy.”
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